For some people, this results in having an ongoing problem with finding ourselves triggered into fear or anxiety when we are confronted with anything that reminds us of the original situation that emotionally hurt us all left us feeling overwhelmed. These kinds of situations can be anything from difficult family contexts through to sexual abuse, violent relationships, illness or even very difficult working situations. The surprising thing is that sometimes it is possible to develop fears that have no direct connection to any single previous life experience. These types of situations can include fear of flying, fear of particular types of animals and so on.
It is not unusual for people to develop lifestyles which try hard to avoid any reminders that might trigger us into the kind of anxiety that we associate with our fear or phobia. The difficulty with this, is that while it means that we don’t have to be triggered as often as we might otherwise be, it creates a different problem in that we have to be alert the whole time so that we can avoid the triggers. This can mean that we end up living a life that doesn’t enable us to do all the things, go all the places, or meet all the people that he would really like to do. In this way trying to cope with our fear or phobia can mean that we are always focused on the possibility that the very things that we fear might be just around the corner.
It can prove really helpful to consult with one of our psychologists or counsellors in order to learn ways to cope with these anxieties and fears, but also to develop ways of understanding why we react the way that we do, and how to achieve the kind of life that we dreamt of having in the past. Life can always be improved, and being able to talk about our concerns with someone who is not going to judge us, and understands the kinds of difficulties that most people face, is often the best first step that we can take.